Hey there.
I just wanted to let everyone reading along that I am signing off on this blog. I had high hopes that I would be able to find the time to post and to share my thoughts on our days. The more backed up that I have gotten, I realize how impossible it is going to be. We have one week left. Please pray for us. This has been one of the hardest trips of my life and I am so grateful for all of you who have been praying. We love you and can't wait to see you soon!
Sunday, July 29, 2007
Saturday, July 28, 2007
The Peak
Friday, July 13th
I have come to a discovery today. I think that it is partly due to the physical and emotional energy it takes to travel from one place to the next here with 2 preschoolers. You decide for the day where you want to go and you get really excited about all the fun you will have and all that you will see and do. But then theres the journey to get there. Now that's not always so much fun. It's hard, it's exhausting, and sometimes stressful. Now why is this, I ask myself. Mainly it's because all my enjoyment has gone into the destination and not in the journey. If only we could get to Ocean Park, then we would have so much fun! If only we can get through the plane ride and get to Hong Kong, then we will be o.k. So what have I discovered? I have discovered that if I don't choose joy in the journey, if I don't see the journey or the place that I am in this moment as the destination for now, I will miss it! I will miss what God is doing in me today. I will miss the enjoyment of my children in the Taxi. And most likely if I miss it, I will get to my so called destination exhausted, and disappointed from unmet expectations.
So that takes me to the next journey for the Dean family. The Peak. The Peak as at the top of a mountain and overlooks Hong Kong. We rode a trolley up the side of the mountain and saw the most breath taking views. We ate at McDonalds (smile) because all of the other restaurants were for all the couples who were looking for romantic dining overlooking all the lights of Hong Kong. If I can admit to you, I was a bit jealous, but thankfully I had already given up that right along time ago! Overlooking the city, I stood in awe of the greatness of God and his heart for all the people that lived in this city. "May your name be great in this city Lord. May you be magnified and glorified in this place."
So the trek home was no different than any other that we have had. Long and exhausting. But this one was different. On this journey home we had detours and surprises. It was unplanned. It was fun. After seeing the spectacular views, we decided to walk around the little area and see some of the billion dollar houses that found there residence on "the Peak". I had read that their were a few trails that you could take. We were walking on a little path with all of the intentions of going back and taking the tram back down the mountain. I had seen a couple walking on one path, so we decided to follow along. It's 8:30 at night mind you and we don't have the stroller with us. So we walk and walk and walk. About that time a French couple backpacking passed by us. We asked them how far down it was to the underground transportaion. They told us that it wasn't to far, you just go to the escalator and ride down. By this time we realized that we were already committed due to the steep path that we had been walking down. It would be much easier to keep walking down than to start walking up. Caleb was to tired to walk. So we wal and walk and walk. I had been carring Caleb and could no longer because my knees felt like they could colapse at any moment. So Matt took over and we continue down. Let me remind you that we are in the tropical climate so due to the humidity we were all now dripping with sweat. Josh says "Mommy, this adventure is to long!" We finally made it down thinking how bazzar it must have looke dto the French backpackers to come across 2 suberban looking Americans walking down the Peak at 9:00 at night with their 2 preschoolers. So the big questin of the night is "Where's the escalator?" It's just funny to me. Here we are in a big city looking for an escalator. Granted it is one of the longest escalators anywhere, it's just funny to me. After walking through windy little roads- Matt is now carring both boys in his arms we met a guy and asked him where the escalator was. This is sad but true.....the escalator the one we had been walking towards for the last hour, on a trail that only backpackers take, in the darkness of the night, it only goes up from the hours 7-10. Meaning it will not take us to the MTR. It will only take us back up to the Peak. Our you kidding me? Thankfully, we were waling in a cozy part of the city, thankfully you can't have guns in Hong Kong, and thankfully this is a safe part of the city. So my dear heart says....."Why don't we just take the escalator back to the tp of the Peak and ride the tram back down, that's what i wanted to do anyway."
Did I just fall off of another planet? Did you not just carry both boys down a mountain and you now want to go back up? So we start back up. We were have ing a good time, laughing at the crazyness of it all. Josh was being such a trooper and Caleb had fallen asleep along time ago. So why not? It's only 10:30 at this point and we only have about and hour journey to get back home, sure, let's go back up! The funniest part about this was, were on the escalator riding up through the city- there are little stops along the way to get off so you can go where you need to go. Anyway were headed back up and at one of the stops inside a little grocery store, was the French couple. She looked at me (I think they were buying water) with a puzzled look on her face, I just waved and smiled and continued to ride the escalator back up with the fam to where we had just come from. Bless the Lord Oh my soul someone told us wrong and the escalator did not go all the way to the top. We got off the escalator obviously because it just stopped .... there was no more escalator and we were not at the Peak. Ok, so we will now get a cab to the underground transportation station. So we are on the subway switching back and forth- still not even close to home. Finally at 11:45 I put my foot down. Josh and I (I was holding him by now) are getting a cab.....are you coming with us? (smile) Thankfully he did and thankfully when we got home this time are keys worked!!! Thank you Jesus!!!
I have come to a discovery today. I think that it is partly due to the physical and emotional energy it takes to travel from one place to the next here with 2 preschoolers. You decide for the day where you want to go and you get really excited about all the fun you will have and all that you will see and do. But then theres the journey to get there. Now that's not always so much fun. It's hard, it's exhausting, and sometimes stressful. Now why is this, I ask myself. Mainly it's because all my enjoyment has gone into the destination and not in the journey. If only we could get to Ocean Park, then we would have so much fun! If only we can get through the plane ride and get to Hong Kong, then we will be o.k. So what have I discovered? I have discovered that if I don't choose joy in the journey, if I don't see the journey or the place that I am in this moment as the destination for now, I will miss it! I will miss what God is doing in me today. I will miss the enjoyment of my children in the Taxi. And most likely if I miss it, I will get to my so called destination exhausted, and disappointed from unmet expectations.
So that takes me to the next journey for the Dean family. The Peak. The Peak as at the top of a mountain and overlooks Hong Kong. We rode a trolley up the side of the mountain and saw the most breath taking views. We ate at McDonalds (smile) because all of the other restaurants were for all the couples who were looking for romantic dining overlooking all the lights of Hong Kong. If I can admit to you, I was a bit jealous, but thankfully I had already given up that right along time ago! Overlooking the city, I stood in awe of the greatness of God and his heart for all the people that lived in this city. "May your name be great in this city Lord. May you be magnified and glorified in this place."
So the trek home was no different than any other that we have had. Long and exhausting. But this one was different. On this journey home we had detours and surprises. It was unplanned. It was fun. After seeing the spectacular views, we decided to walk around the little area and see some of the billion dollar houses that found there residence on "the Peak". I had read that their were a few trails that you could take. We were walking on a little path with all of the intentions of going back and taking the tram back down the mountain. I had seen a couple walking on one path, so we decided to follow along. It's 8:30 at night mind you and we don't have the stroller with us. So we walk and walk and walk. About that time a French couple backpacking passed by us. We asked them how far down it was to the underground transportaion. They told us that it wasn't to far, you just go to the escalator and ride down. By this time we realized that we were already committed due to the steep path that we had been walking down. It would be much easier to keep walking down than to start walking up. Caleb was to tired to walk. So we wal and walk and walk. I had been carring Caleb and could no longer because my knees felt like they could colapse at any moment. So Matt took over and we continue down. Let me remind you that we are in the tropical climate so due to the humidity we were all now dripping with sweat. Josh says "Mommy, this adventure is to long!" We finally made it down thinking how bazzar it must have looke dto the French backpackers to come across 2 suberban looking Americans walking down the Peak at 9:00 at night with their 2 preschoolers. So the big questin of the night is "Where's the escalator?" It's just funny to me. Here we are in a big city looking for an escalator. Granted it is one of the longest escalators anywhere, it's just funny to me. After walking through windy little roads- Matt is now carring both boys in his arms we met a guy and asked him where the escalator was. This is sad but true.....the escalator the one we had been walking towards for the last hour, on a trail that only backpackers take, in the darkness of the night, it only goes up from the hours 7-10. Meaning it will not take us to the MTR. It will only take us back up to the Peak. Our you kidding me? Thankfully, we were waling in a cozy part of the city, thankfully you can't have guns in Hong Kong, and thankfully this is a safe part of the city. So my dear heart says....."Why don't we just take the escalator back to the tp of the Peak and ride the tram back down, that's what i wanted to do anyway."
Did I just fall off of another planet? Did you not just carry both boys down a mountain and you now want to go back up? So we start back up. We were have ing a good time, laughing at the crazyness of it all. Josh was being such a trooper and Caleb had fallen asleep along time ago. So why not? It's only 10:30 at this point and we only have about and hour journey to get back home, sure, let's go back up! The funniest part about this was, were on the escalator riding up through the city- there are little stops along the way to get off so you can go where you need to go. Anyway were headed back up and at one of the stops inside a little grocery store, was the French couple. She looked at me (I think they were buying water) with a puzzled look on her face, I just waved and smiled and continued to ride the escalator back up with the fam to where we had just come from. Bless the Lord Oh my soul someone told us wrong and the escalator did not go all the way to the top. We got off the escalator obviously because it just stopped .... there was no more escalator and we were not at the Peak. Ok, so we will now get a cab to the underground transportation station. So we are on the subway switching back and forth- still not even close to home. Finally at 11:45 I put my foot down. Josh and I (I was holding him by now) are getting a cab.....are you coming with us? (smile) Thankfully he did and thankfully when we got home this time are keys worked!!! Thank you Jesus!!!
The Bible Study Let Down
I know that the title of this post sounds a bit crazy, but you will soon understand what I am talking about. Since Sunday I have been so excited about going to a ladies Bible Study on with the church we have been visiting. I was so excited about being able to fellowship with other moms. Plus, I was just plain desperate! I have already told you how hard the whole internet communication has been. I have talked with my mom on occasion, but it is hard to really talk when you are in a common room. I am sure you can imagine.
Matt was so sweet, he had already taken the boys to a local Mall to get a few things so that I could go with the girls on the team. I could not wait! so I go down to the lobby and pass by one of our sight leaders. We were making small talk, and in passing I mentioned that we were going to the study. She then let me know that it was against policy for anyone to go to a bible study in someone else's home. It would be alright if I were to go, but the girls on the team were not allowed. Oh my goodness. I can not tell you how crushed I was. I wanted to cry. It did not make sense to me. So, I went with the team to the mall to eat, grab some things from the grocery store and come home. "Lord Jesus, what next? I am trying so hard! I feel like everything that I try to do, to help make this a sane and healthy experience for the boys and I gets thwarted in some form or fashion. What would you have me do? I don't know what right i can give up next or how more surrendered I can be!"
Matt was so sweet, he had already taken the boys to a local Mall to get a few things so that I could go with the girls on the team. I could not wait! so I go down to the lobby and pass by one of our sight leaders. We were making small talk, and in passing I mentioned that we were going to the study. She then let me know that it was against policy for anyone to go to a bible study in someone else's home. It would be alright if I were to go, but the girls on the team were not allowed. Oh my goodness. I can not tell you how crushed I was. I wanted to cry. It did not make sense to me. So, I went with the team to the mall to eat, grab some things from the grocery store and come home. "Lord Jesus, what next? I am trying so hard! I feel like everything that I try to do, to help make this a sane and healthy experience for the boys and I gets thwarted in some form or fashion. What would you have me do? I don't know what right i can give up next or how more surrendered I can be!"
Ocean Park
Wednesday July 11th
Today our team was off due to teacher in-service day. So Matt and I decided to take the boys to Ocean Park. On our way we needed to drop off our laundry at a laundry service. It cost the same as doing it in th laundry mat of the dorm. So we load the boys the stroller and all of our laundry into a taxi cab. This was our only taxi cab driver so far that spoke any English. So, we are driving, big buildings, cars driving crazy, and people everywhere. Bottom line is that sometimes you feel like you are on sensory overload because of all that is going on around you. Josh sitting in the middle of us says "Mommy, look theres a cross." He was pointing to a tiny little steeple far off in the distance in the middle of all the buildings. He then proceeded to tell me and everyone in the cab, that That is where Jesus died on the cross for us so that He could live in our hearts. Wow! Out of the mouths of babes He has ordained praise!
The journey to Ocean Park was long and hot. Someone had given us wrong directions that took us in a complete circle. Finally we arrived and the boys loved seeing all the sharks and fish. The rides were alot of fun, especially the ride on the cart that took us over the mountain. "Lord you are so amazing!!"
The journey home consisted of a double decker bus (which Matt insisted we ride on the top, even if he had to carry the stroller up a narrow staircase), the underground subway (switching 3 different times), and last but not least a cab. We then take a small walk to the elevator, up to the 18th floor hot exhausted and all just ready to crash, and you guess it, our key won't work. This sisn't a big deal, I know. But by the end of a long day it is just the amount of pressure needed to just about put you over. Thank you Jesus for your grace and your mercy.
Today our team was off due to teacher in-service day. So Matt and I decided to take the boys to Ocean Park. On our way we needed to drop off our laundry at a laundry service. It cost the same as doing it in th laundry mat of the dorm. So we load the boys the stroller and all of our laundry into a taxi cab. This was our only taxi cab driver so far that spoke any English. So, we are driving, big buildings, cars driving crazy, and people everywhere. Bottom line is that sometimes you feel like you are on sensory overload because of all that is going on around you. Josh sitting in the middle of us says "Mommy, look theres a cross." He was pointing to a tiny little steeple far off in the distance in the middle of all the buildings. He then proceeded to tell me and everyone in the cab, that That is where Jesus died on the cross for us so that He could live in our hearts. Wow! Out of the mouths of babes He has ordained praise!
The journey to Ocean Park was long and hot. Someone had given us wrong directions that took us in a complete circle. Finally we arrived and the boys loved seeing all the sharks and fish. The rides were alot of fun, especially the ride on the cart that took us over the mountain. "Lord you are so amazing!!"
The journey home consisted of a double decker bus (which Matt insisted we ride on the top, even if he had to carry the stroller up a narrow staircase), the underground subway (switching 3 different times), and last but not least a cab. We then take a small walk to the elevator, up to the 18th floor hot exhausted and all just ready to crash, and you guess it, our key won't work. This sisn't a big deal, I know. But by the end of a long day it is just the amount of pressure needed to just about put you over. Thank you Jesus for your grace and your mercy.
Friday, July 27, 2007
I Am Coming Apart!
Tuesday, July 10th
Today the team left for their first day in the classroom with their students. As for me and the boys, well I am having a "come apart" day. The last 2 weeks have been rather intense. The only way I can describe it, is that it feels like I am in a pressure cooker. Today I think the reality of being here is starting to take it's toll.
"OK, what am I going to do all day with the boys while our team is gone until 4:00. How do I warm the bottles? How do I keep the boys from rolling around on the dirty floor and jumping on our pillows with their shoes? How do I get my stupid key to work in the door and how do I muster up enough energy to take the boys back down to the ground floor (we are on the 18th floor) when we are all just about to fall out from heat exhaustion or from the bursting of our tears." We have had it! Our playtime with friends today got cancelled. If you can't tell we were banking on that one. I found out to late in the day to try to figure out a new plan. I am pretty desperate for fellowship. Our team is great, they just aren't here. I would love to email or talk to you anyone from home, but I can only get internet in a common room down the hall. The connection is very very slow. By the time I get connected which is about 20 minutes, the boys are jumping off the walls and falling off chairs. Forget about trying to think clearly. Mostly what I want is to find a small little room where I can scream as loudly as possible and then cry until I can't cry anymore.
So I guess you won't be surprised to know that there is something on the bottom of my foot that itches really bad and that we also discovered today that we have bed bugs. Matt went tdown to housing to let them know. He said the ladies looked at him funny and then started talking about him in Cantonese. They said that they would come up and change our sheets. As he left they handed him a bag of dried ginger root (all chopped up) to put under our sheets. It is supposed to repell them. Have you ever tried to sleep on chunks of ginger root? Josh said "Mom there is something in my bed!" I didn't want to tell him that it was to keep the bugs away- I knew if I did, he would end up sleeping with me. So I told him it would keep his bed fresh.
Smiling and crying all at the same time- April
Today the team left for their first day in the classroom with their students. As for me and the boys, well I am having a "come apart" day. The last 2 weeks have been rather intense. The only way I can describe it, is that it feels like I am in a pressure cooker. Today I think the reality of being here is starting to take it's toll.
"OK, what am I going to do all day with the boys while our team is gone until 4:00. How do I warm the bottles? How do I keep the boys from rolling around on the dirty floor and jumping on our pillows with their shoes? How do I get my stupid key to work in the door and how do I muster up enough energy to take the boys back down to the ground floor (we are on the 18th floor) when we are all just about to fall out from heat exhaustion or from the bursting of our tears." We have had it! Our playtime with friends today got cancelled. If you can't tell we were banking on that one. I found out to late in the day to try to figure out a new plan. I am pretty desperate for fellowship. Our team is great, they just aren't here. I would love to email or talk to you anyone from home, but I can only get internet in a common room down the hall. The connection is very very slow. By the time I get connected which is about 20 minutes, the boys are jumping off the walls and falling off chairs. Forget about trying to think clearly. Mostly what I want is to find a small little room where I can scream as loudly as possible and then cry until I can't cry anymore.
So I guess you won't be surprised to know that there is something on the bottom of my foot that itches really bad and that we also discovered today that we have bed bugs. Matt went tdown to housing to let them know. He said the ladies looked at him funny and then started talking about him in Cantonese. They said that they would come up and change our sheets. As he left they handed him a bag of dried ginger root (all chopped up) to put under our sheets. It is supposed to repell them. Have you ever tried to sleep on chunks of ginger root? Josh said "Mom there is something in my bed!" I didn't want to tell him that it was to keep the bugs away- I knew if I did, he would end up sleeping with me. So I told him it would keep his bed fresh.
Smiling and crying all at the same time- April
Tuesday, July 24, 2007
Snoopy Land!
Monday/ July 9th
First Day of School! Gage Day
Today are team met all the students and gauged how well they spoke English. From what they say, the school is great and they are so excited about teaching the students English.
Today the boys and I needed a Sabbath. We made puppets, watched movies, took naps, and played. Dorm life is great. You all should try it sometime!
If you love shopping, you will love Hong Kong. It seems like they have major shopping centers everywhere you go. Matt, the boy’s and I went to a mall that had a “Snoopy’s World” play area. Matt played with the boy’s while I looked around. What a great husband!! We found a Ruby Tuesday’s for dinner. I couldn’t wait! Matt and I both ordered the Club Salad. I took my first bite and for some reason it tasted like one of the smells that I have been smelling randomly in the stores or building that I have gone into. It is not a musty smell or a fish smell. I can’t quite describe it, all I know is that it turns my stomach and the 3 bites that I had of my salad all tasted just like that smell! So frustrating!!!
First Day of School! Gage Day
Today are team met all the students and gauged how well they spoke English. From what they say, the school is great and they are so excited about teaching the students English.
Today the boys and I needed a Sabbath. We made puppets, watched movies, took naps, and played. Dorm life is great. You all should try it sometime!
If you love shopping, you will love Hong Kong. It seems like they have major shopping centers everywhere you go. Matt, the boy’s and I went to a mall that had a “Snoopy’s World” play area. Matt played with the boy’s while I looked around. What a great husband!! We found a Ruby Tuesday’s for dinner. I couldn’t wait! Matt and I both ordered the Club Salad. I took my first bite and for some reason it tasted like one of the smells that I have been smelling randomly in the stores or building that I have gone into. It is not a musty smell or a fish smell. I can’t quite describe it, all I know is that it turns my stomach and the 3 bites that I had of my salad all tasted just like that smell! So frustrating!!!
Evangelical Church of Hong Kong Here We Come!
Sunday/ July 8th
Evangelical Church of Hong Kong Here We Come!
I was so excited about this morning to hopefully find a place that we can plug into for the time we are here. Again the Lord is good. After about an hour journey to get there (walking, subways, and more walking) we arrived at the Hong Kong Convention Center. This is where the church meets in one of the meeting rooms. We made our way to the elevator and met a family that was from Dallas. The Dad graduated from Auburn and they have lived in HK for 2 months. The best part- they had 2 little girls that were 2 ½ and 4 ½ and they had matching dresses. And don’t you know that Josh and Caleb had on their matching outfits. So, it made me smile. We hope to play with them later in the week at a Toy Library. I will let you know how it goes.
The boys had a blast in their Sunday school classes. They were able to run and play with other little kiddies- this was such an answer to prayer for me! The service was good and the Lord spoke again to our hearts confirming that he has us here through Psalm 1. The Pastor spoke to us about spiritual growth and delighting in the Lord.
The past couple of weeks have been really hard. Harder than I am describing to you in what I am writing. Matt and I have questioned so many times whether or not we made the right decision in bringing our family. I have felt like I have come to the end of April on an hourly basis. Sometimes in tears, sometimes after reacting in my flesh, sometimes after one more pressure point gets pushed, or from my expectations getting blown up in my face for the 30th time of the day. “Why am I here?” I scream out inside? So hearing the pastor talk about growth was water to my soul.
On my bulletin I wrote two titles that I wanted to give more thought or develop more in my heart-
1) Why is it so hard to die? (render myself dead- crucified with Christ)
2) Adjusting to His reality for Me (The whole idea of surrendering my expectations for what he has for me.)
So walking back to the subway, Matt and I talked about the idea, that we might not be under attack from the enemy because of “something big God might do in our midst here in Hong Kong” but rather the enemy is more so on the prowl for what God is doing “in us”. We came to the conclusion that the Lord Jesus has seen fit to bring us to an intensive learning classroom (Hong Kong) to shape and mold us- in a way that he could only do so apart from all that was familiar and working for us. He is using just as he has promised, all that the enemy has thrown at us for our destruction- he is using it as a refining fire.
Bless you Jesus, for not leaving us the same as we were yesterday. You are more than I could ever have imagined you would be. I honor you. Today Lord, Matt and I commit to not doubting why we are here anymore. We are drawing a line in the sand. That line of thought from the enemy will not work with us anymore. You have confirmed ever- so patiently with us that you have led us here. Today we choose to believe you.
Evangelical Church of Hong Kong Here We Come!
I was so excited about this morning to hopefully find a place that we can plug into for the time we are here. Again the Lord is good. After about an hour journey to get there (walking, subways, and more walking) we arrived at the Hong Kong Convention Center. This is where the church meets in one of the meeting rooms. We made our way to the elevator and met a family that was from Dallas. The Dad graduated from Auburn and they have lived in HK for 2 months. The best part- they had 2 little girls that were 2 ½ and 4 ½ and they had matching dresses. And don’t you know that Josh and Caleb had on their matching outfits. So, it made me smile. We hope to play with them later in the week at a Toy Library. I will let you know how it goes.
The boys had a blast in their Sunday school classes. They were able to run and play with other little kiddies- this was such an answer to prayer for me! The service was good and the Lord spoke again to our hearts confirming that he has us here through Psalm 1. The Pastor spoke to us about spiritual growth and delighting in the Lord.
The past couple of weeks have been really hard. Harder than I am describing to you in what I am writing. Matt and I have questioned so many times whether or not we made the right decision in bringing our family. I have felt like I have come to the end of April on an hourly basis. Sometimes in tears, sometimes after reacting in my flesh, sometimes after one more pressure point gets pushed, or from my expectations getting blown up in my face for the 30th time of the day. “Why am I here?” I scream out inside? So hearing the pastor talk about growth was water to my soul.
On my bulletin I wrote two titles that I wanted to give more thought or develop more in my heart-
1) Why is it so hard to die? (render myself dead- crucified with Christ)
2) Adjusting to His reality for Me (The whole idea of surrendering my expectations for what he has for me.)
So walking back to the subway, Matt and I talked about the idea, that we might not be under attack from the enemy because of “something big God might do in our midst here in Hong Kong” but rather the enemy is more so on the prowl for what God is doing “in us”. We came to the conclusion that the Lord Jesus has seen fit to bring us to an intensive learning classroom (Hong Kong) to shape and mold us- in a way that he could only do so apart from all that was familiar and working for us. He is using just as he has promised, all that the enemy has thrown at us for our destruction- he is using it as a refining fire.
Bless you Jesus, for not leaving us the same as we were yesterday. You are more than I could ever have imagined you would be. I honor you. Today Lord, Matt and I commit to not doubting why we are here anymore. We are drawing a line in the sand. That line of thought from the enemy will not work with us anymore. You have confirmed ever- so patiently with us that you have led us here. Today we choose to believe you.
Our First Outing!
Saturday/ July 7th
Our first Outing!
Matt and the team went to the school today to meet with the principal. So the boys and I charted our course and were off to brave this new land. The plan was to walk about ½ a mile to Lo Fuk were there was a park and shopping center. Off we go in the thick humid heat. The road we were told to take was a bit hilly, so pushing the struggle was quite a strain! The park was nice but so hot! We decided to for go the heat and make our way to the shopping center. This was not an obvious shopping center and we are on the side of town where there is a lot of government housing and not a lot of tourist. I say all this to tell you this side of town was not developed with tourist in mind. Also on this side of town we are pretty much the only Americans that you will see. We stick out like sore thumbs! So I am trying to find my way and a Chinese lady sees me with the boys and becomes concerned about the sun shining down on them. So she walks alongside of me with her umbrella covering the boys in the double stroller. Of course she did not speak any English, so I was trying to communicate with her where I was going. She finally figured it out and took me to the shopping center. At first I was just praying that she was leading us in the right direction because she took us through an open market of people cooking food in what looks like an old parking lot (underneath the shopping center). Josh’s words explain it best- “Mommy, something stinks!” This was our first whiff of many unpleasant smells to come! This sweet lady (a God-send) helped me down the stairs with the stroller and into the shopping center- in which I would have never found on my own. This shopping center is not like our shopping centers. It is about 8 stories of tiny shops that are connected to another building that is exactly the same. You can buy groceries, shoes, house goods, flowers, junk, get your hair done, or your shoes fixed. You can also buy an assortment of dried mystery products here. It can range from sea urchins to fruit. So with each new store you have a brand new smell. I was al little nervous about this shopping center because it felt like 100 mazes just on one floor. Not wanting to venture out to far with my little treasures I decided to stay on this one floor. Caleb was in need of a diaper change, so we went looking for the bathroom. We found it only to realize that the stroller would not fit. So making an executive decision I decided to call it a day. We had only been gone about an hour and a half! We made the hot trek back tired and worn out. But, we were proud! We were proud that we made it to our destination. We were proud that we had stepped out of all that was comfortable and did something that was completely unfamiliar. I hope you are smiling with me! Sometimes it doesn’t take much does it.
That evening we went with the team to a place that is kind of like Time Square in NYC. It’s called Nathan Road. We walked up the stairs from the subway and really all you can say is “Wow”. Blinking neon lights are everywhere, cars zooming and honking their horns, people crowding and walking the streets, the smells of dried ??? coming at you. What is this place that we have just walked into? Definitely something to see, but how could this be your everyday life? We ended up eating at the Spaghetti House after about a 45 minute wait. We were all so exhausted! There have been 2 moments on our trip so far where the Lord has spoken to us through o very still small voice. And tonight was one of them. As we were walking down Nathan street with so many things to look at, all demanding your attention all at once- Josh said “Mommy, look at that star.” I looked up, there were no stars. I said “Where’s the star?” He pointed, and out in the distance at the top of the city line, nestled in between the buildings was one random star. How in the world did he see this amongst all the neon lights and hustle and bustle of the people? It is so cool how the Lord reminds us that life is truly all about Him. He is the only one that could have drawn Josh’s eyes to that star. Through Josh the Lord allowed me to be more in awe of him than in the lights of the city. “Thank you Jesus, you are so impressive to me.”
Our first Outing!
Matt and the team went to the school today to meet with the principal. So the boys and I charted our course and were off to brave this new land. The plan was to walk about ½ a mile to Lo Fuk were there was a park and shopping center. Off we go in the thick humid heat. The road we were told to take was a bit hilly, so pushing the struggle was quite a strain! The park was nice but so hot! We decided to for go the heat and make our way to the shopping center. This was not an obvious shopping center and we are on the side of town where there is a lot of government housing and not a lot of tourist. I say all this to tell you this side of town was not developed with tourist in mind. Also on this side of town we are pretty much the only Americans that you will see. We stick out like sore thumbs! So I am trying to find my way and a Chinese lady sees me with the boys and becomes concerned about the sun shining down on them. So she walks alongside of me with her umbrella covering the boys in the double stroller. Of course she did not speak any English, so I was trying to communicate with her where I was going. She finally figured it out and took me to the shopping center. At first I was just praying that she was leading us in the right direction because she took us through an open market of people cooking food in what looks like an old parking lot (underneath the shopping center). Josh’s words explain it best- “Mommy, something stinks!” This was our first whiff of many unpleasant smells to come! This sweet lady (a God-send) helped me down the stairs with the stroller and into the shopping center- in which I would have never found on my own. This shopping center is not like our shopping centers. It is about 8 stories of tiny shops that are connected to another building that is exactly the same. You can buy groceries, shoes, house goods, flowers, junk, get your hair done, or your shoes fixed. You can also buy an assortment of dried mystery products here. It can range from sea urchins to fruit. So with each new store you have a brand new smell. I was al little nervous about this shopping center because it felt like 100 mazes just on one floor. Not wanting to venture out to far with my little treasures I decided to stay on this one floor. Caleb was in need of a diaper change, so we went looking for the bathroom. We found it only to realize that the stroller would not fit. So making an executive decision I decided to call it a day. We had only been gone about an hour and a half! We made the hot trek back tired and worn out. But, we were proud! We were proud that we made it to our destination. We were proud that we had stepped out of all that was comfortable and did something that was completely unfamiliar. I hope you are smiling with me! Sometimes it doesn’t take much does it.
That evening we went with the team to a place that is kind of like Time Square in NYC. It’s called Nathan Road. We walked up the stairs from the subway and really all you can say is “Wow”. Blinking neon lights are everywhere, cars zooming and honking their horns, people crowding and walking the streets, the smells of dried ??? coming at you. What is this place that we have just walked into? Definitely something to see, but how could this be your everyday life? We ended up eating at the Spaghetti House after about a 45 minute wait. We were all so exhausted! There have been 2 moments on our trip so far where the Lord has spoken to us through o very still small voice. And tonight was one of them. As we were walking down Nathan street with so many things to look at, all demanding your attention all at once- Josh said “Mommy, look at that star.” I looked up, there were no stars. I said “Where’s the star?” He pointed, and out in the distance at the top of the city line, nestled in between the buildings was one random star. How in the world did he see this amongst all the neon lights and hustle and bustle of the people? It is so cool how the Lord reminds us that life is truly all about Him. He is the only one that could have drawn Josh’s eyes to that star. Through Josh the Lord allowed me to be more in awe of him than in the lights of the city. “Thank you Jesus, you are so impressive to me.”
Wednesday, July 18, 2007
The Plane
Wednesday/ July 4th
The Plane Ride
The Lord was so faithful! Of course! In my anticipation for the long journey ahead, I kept praying and placing my trust in him that he would just help us make it through. Finally the Holy Spirit prompted me with the question- “What is it that you are praying for? Are you praying that you or the boy’s won’t be exhausted, that they will be perfect? That they won’t get fussy and cry? Are you asking that you would not loose it or get stressed out?” As I started to think about the line of prayers that I had been praying for, the Holy Spirit revealed his heart to me. “Life is not just about having things easy although sometimes they are. Life many times is very hard.
My line of praying in a way set me up. If the ride was not stress free would that mean that God did not answer my prayer? Then what? I would probably have been frustrated. He reminded me that He has not promised me “easy circumstances” He has promised me Himself! “If you go to the depths, I am there. If you make your bed on the far side of the sea, I am there. And there my hand will surely guide thee. A slight change in perspective is everything. “April, if the boys start to get cranky…I am there. If you start to loose your patience…I will be your strength. If you start to struggle because of cramped space and exhaustion I will uphold you. I will be your strength for this journey.”
We left California Baptist at 8:30 p.m. and loaded a bus for LAX Airport. Mind you this is 10:30 p.m. Opelika time. We arrived at the airport with about 100 other people who would also be flying out with our big group. With our stroller, 4 big suitcases, 7 carry on bags, and boys (Caleb being asleep) we made it with our team (14 of us) through check in. (praise the Lord they did not weigh any of our bags!) Following check-in and a small bite to eat at Burger King we made our way through security. So you can picture this mirical accurately, let me remind you of our 7 carry on bags, stroller (that had to be folded down and placed through the xray machine) 2 laptop computers that had to come out of their bags, 2 ziplock bags full of liquids that had to be placed in the bends, and last but not least taking off of everyone’s shoes- only to get it through the
x-ray machine to then put it all back together again to make it to our gate. Not a problem!
We waited at our gate about an hour and a half playing and reading books. We had one small melt down which we were quickly able to recover from. We loaded the plane at 2 in the morning only to find out the four of us were all in separate seats. What in the world? Needless to say we worked it out and all sat together in the middle isle of the plane. About 45 minutes into the trip the boys fell asleep. Thank you Jesus! Our Dr. Had given us some sleeping pills to help us with the plane ride and jet lag. So Matt suggested that we both take one. I told him that I wasn’t going to take one, because somebody had to be able to wake up if the boys needed something. He assured me that it took a good hour for it to set in and that they didn’t keep you asleep, they just helped you fall asleep. So, I believed him and we both took one. Caleb was laying in my lap and I was dinking a cup of water. About fifteen minutes later I was talking to Matt and without knowing anything I dumped my cup of water on Caleb and fell right to sleep. Matt said that I was clueless. Thankfully it did not wake Caleb up and we all slept about 7 hours! Unbelievable!
The following six hours of our trip had it’s ups and downs but all in all we were so grateful to the Lord and to get off the plane! We had about a 2 hour wait in the airport and a 45 minute bus ride to the college. At this point I was so worn out and needing the journey to be over!
So we get to the college and I am thinking this is great we will be able to go straight to our rooms and crash. Not the case. Let’s go on ahead and tack on 2 more hours for our teams to go through debriefing while the boys and I sat waiting in a cafeteria. Let me just tell you that this is the moment when I started to loose perspective. Of course the boys did just fine, but I had, had all that I could handle. We get to the room and our keys don’t work. So back down we go. Our dorm rooms are great and will serve us just fine while we are here. But on this day of our arrival they were not as clean as you would have hoped for- especially when your two year old runs to the potty and grabs it with both hands. “Oh dear Jesus, I am so desperate!” At this point it is 11:00 am here in Hong Kong and 10:00 pm Opelika time. You would think they would be exhausted- I know I was! So we unpacked a little and went downstairs to the cafeteria to eat lunch. This has been great for me- because I don’t have to leave the University to go eat if I don’t want to. All the cafeteria workers and security guards just love Josh and Caleb. They are all just mesmerized by Caleb’s blonde hair and blue eyes. So we eat lunch and I am thinking surely they will go right down for a nap. Not the case. They had caught their second wind and were bouncing of the walls. Matt was at a leaders meeting getting all the logistics worked out- while logistically speaking I was coming undone! “What’s wrong Mommy?” Josh would ask as he and Caleb were jumping on our beds and throwing our pillows on the not so clean floor. “I am just having a hard time” I said. “Oh mommy it will be ok” he replied.
Finally they went to bed at 4:00 pm HK time and 5 am Opelika time. “Bless their little hearts, they have been real troopers. Thank you Jesus that they are finally sleeping soundly.” They did pretty good through the night. They woke up at 2 am HK time. We watched a Veggie Tale- “Gideon”. The Lord used it to speak to my heart through the old familiar song they sing “His Eye is on the Sparrow”. Thank you Lord for speaking truth to my heart at 2 am through Larry the Cucumber! Back to sleep we went, resting in the care of the Lord.
Unless You Become As a Child
I am sure by now you can see that we had to get creative to find things to do while in California. This was a fun one- the sprinklers!
Go Into All the World
I love this picture. Thank you Lord for allowing us to go across the ocean to speak of your name!
I don't know if you can see, but this is a water fountain. The big ball is the world. Pretty neat.
Again, (smile) finding things to do at Cal- Baptist.
Tuesday, July 17, 2007
Tuesday, July 3, 2007
Leaving Borderland
When I saw the chapter title "Leaving Borderland" by Mark Buchannan in his book "Your God is to Safe"- I knew that I wanted to use it for my blog title. Because that is how I feel at this juncture in my life. Taking students to China to teach English has been on our hearts for quite some time now. We have prayed, planned, and made all the arrangements to make it possible. The months of preparation have seemed long and drawn out. In one sense I am chomping at the bit to get there and on the other hand I am asking "now what is this really going to require of me?" I know what it's like for me to stay. The boys and I have a pretty good routine that works well for us. "What was I thinking when I agreed to travel 16 hours with a 2 and a 4 year old and to sleep in a dorm room for a month?" I am pretty comfortable at home. Borderland for me ask the question "do I stay or do I go?" Do I stay where everything is predictable and the roads are well travelled? Or do I go into places that are completely unfamiliar, uncomfortable, and that require something of me that I am unaware if I will be able to handle. The journey of our life is constantly taking us to the borderlands in one form or another. I am more so talking now about the spiritual sense of the matter. Just like the Israelites wondered in the wilderness for 40 years (their borderland) before choosing to trust God and to move into Caanan, the land God had promised them. You see going on this trip and leaving "borderland" is about physically enduring a different lifestyle than I am used to, but greater than that it's about the Lord using these unfamiliar circumstances to do major surgery on my heart. To uncover fears that have held me captive and to extract ways and patterns that lead to sickness and disease. To leave borderland means that new buttons will be pushed and that I can not comfortably manage how I will react. I am choosing to go. To stay would be to become stagnet. But if I go, there is a promise that I will be different, and there is a promise that I will be able to know God not just with my head but with my heart. This is the promise land- coming to understand the inheritance that I have in Jesus Christ with my heart. Meaning....that my life is changed, that I live differently, that fear is replaced by freedom, and that my delight in the Lord is overflowing with milk and honey.
In taking this first step....I really don't know what all this will mean. I have yet to see how many giants await me, and I have yet to see how big the fruit really is in Cannan. I can't paint the full picture of what "Leaving Borderland" will be like, until I have left it completely. Will I wish that I didn't leave, or will I be proud that I stepped out and over the line. That is still to be decided. So at the end of this little journey, I hope to write my reflections on what "Leaving Borderland" really meant for me.
Thanks for your prayers. Thanks for being a part of my journey. Thanks for encouraging me to go.
Sunday, July 1, 2007
Be Strong and Courageous!
"Have I not commanded you? Be strong and courageous. Do not be terrified; do not be discouraged, for the Lord your God will be with you wherever you go." Joshua 1:9
I have been studying the book of Joshua these days and reading a book called "Victorious Christian Living" by Alan Redpath.
I love reading the book of Joshua, because it is why we named our two boys Joshua and Caleb. Sometimes when I call out to them around the house I will say, "Joshua Strong and Courageous" and "Caleb Loyal and Brave". It is my heart to speak these truths over them and to remind them of who they are. The best part of it all is when I hear from the other room Josh calling out to Caleb "Caleb Loyal and Brave"!
Embarking on this trip across the world has brought up many emotions. Mostly all at the wrong times. Like when I was at home (we are currently in California) cleaning the house- I would feel so strong and brave. Or 6 months ago when we made our decision to go, I thought that it was the best idea ever! Now with 3 days until we leave I am wondering "now why did we decide to do this?" Other emotions that have reared up, have been while packing all of our bags and thinking about all the little things that I need to bring to make my little ones feel at home- I would start to get teary eyed and long for my home before I had even left. "What am I going to do with myself?" I am an emotional rollercoaster!
Already here in California that has been my question for the Lord not just emotionally but physically as well. The training has been very intense- pretty much on the hour every hour from 7 in the morning to 11 at night. I have had to surrender my desires to participate in the training and being around our group (Matt included) for the day with the exception of lunch and dinner. (I am so thankful for that time.) So with that being said the boys and I are trying to figure out what our days are going to look like and to readjust our expectations. Isn't that always the case! "Oh, Lord Jesus your ways are right and pure- but could you not just let me in on them ahead of time?? "
He has very clearly been speaking to my heart that "He is with me wherever I go" through the book of Joshua and that "He has and is ordering my steps" through Proverbs. He has spoken to my emotional rollercoaster through a phrase in a song: "Whatever steps are before me, I will choose to sing Hallaluia, Hallaluia!" Alan Redpath says, "You don't have to tell someone to be strong, unless they are feeling weak. You don't have to tell someone to be courageous, unless they are feeling scared, and you don't have to tell someone that you will be with them, unless they are feeling alone." And so the Lord says to me, "APRIL, be strong and courageous for the Lord YOUR God will be with YOU." Oh, how I treasure His faithfulness to speak into my life.
The Lord also spoke truth to my heart through this very humorous picture. So many times I think that I have what it takes to fight the battles or quite honestly just to make it through life. I mean, I am going to go on this trip and be the perfect missionary's wife I can be. I'll take care of the children full of joy and contentment and be a beem of strength and confidence. I am so exposed! Just like Joshie and sweet Caleb think they are going to conquer all of our household battles (like Mr. Rat that has made his home in our garage or finding and protecting Mommy from the mystery animal that has dug a deep hole in our yard). We are exposed to the reality that we aren't wearing armour, we are in our "superman" underwear and "Lion King" diaper. Not just that but the guns that we think have so much power are really just a cap gun and a pretend drill. But I am sure that the mean scouls on their faces will threaten anything that comes there way unless the enemy is dressed in a funny costume! But thank goodness for the mud boots! We will get plenty of traction with those! Do you see what I am saying? It is such a facade! A cute one of course, but a facade all the same.
My only way for LIFE and godliness is to pour my whole self into Jesus Christ. He is my only way! Practically speaking for me, it means to walk humbly before him. To see myself as I truly am. "I am a daughter of the King who desperately loves her Father, I am one that He has set apart for his very own purposes, I am one that he has ordained with righteousness and has bestowed very special gifts upon. But he has also chosen me knowing that I try to have it all together all by myself. That I try to "be in the know" so that I can have everything planned just right in order that I might have a sense of control on my life. He also knows that I still have very real fears and hurts that he is in the process of exposing and healing. And He knows that sometimes, despite my best effort I react out of my fears. Thank you Jesus that it pleases you and the Father to send the Holy Spirit to expose the roads that lead to my destruction and to counsel and heal me in the paths of righteousness for your name sake! "Bless You Jesus! You are highly exalted within me!"
Practically speaking it also means for me to surrender to His leading. "Ok Lord, I really wasn't planning on dealing with fear and lonliness today, but here we are!" My Mom used to tell me that sometimes you have to "be brave and do hard things". Relinquishing my rights to protect myself and follow the Lord through my vulnerable wounds is a very hard thing. It's risky and it usually means that death to myself will indeed occur. Don't we all know that is not easy!
For me practically he has also taught me that I have to believe him and to move out in this faith. Trust him that he knows the time and space that he has designated for my healing. Trust him that He knows the purposes that he has for me. Trust Him that He has committed to love me without any caution or regret. It is then that I move out with full confidence in the One who has planted His Spirit in my heart. It is by his power that I am able to walk through the places that He is leading me.
I am moving to a place of anticipation of how and where the Lord is going to lead this Momma and her two warriors as we take on Hong Kong! My Dad encouraged Matt and I before we left- "This trip is going to be more about what the Lord is going to do IN you then what you can do for those in Hong Kong". So maybe instead of saying "as we take on Hong Kong" I should say "I anticipate how the Lord is going to use Hong Kong to take us on and to transform our lives".
To Him who is able to do more .....
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